Well, I stepped on the good old scale today thinking I was up since I am yet to have a blue dot day (day where you only eat your allotted points), and I was down 2lbs. Making my total weight loss 10lbs.
Ive been bad today food wise… I had a midnight snack of canned chicken salad and crackers and some veggie straws and a fizzy water. My cat scratched my face by accident and I had a interview this morning and I was all stressed about that so I ate to feel comfort. Wrong. But on the up side is was not potato chips and a Dr. Pepper.
That 13point mistake sent my day in to a derail. So i’m over by 9 points today. All my weekly points are gone from Saturday and Sunday of not really trying.
I know I shouldn’t expect to be perfect but I really want to be.
I’m obsessed with food, and all I do is eat. Its embarrassing but I’m really struggling to stop. I’m an addictive personality, always have been. I just had no idea that food was my drug of choice. I don’t wanna be a slave to the fuel that keeps me alive. I hate how much time energy and resourced this is taking and I’m not even making the cut point wise.
This is a complete mental battle. Here I thought it was a physical thing.
I am stronger than my brains desire to eat. I am not hungry I am obsessed. It will not taste as good as bikini will feel. Two weeks from now I will be so happy I started now. One year from now I will be happy I started now. This is a lifestyle change not a diet. I am stronger than my addiction to food.
These are the things I have to keep reminding my self.
I’m doing this and I will not give in. It’s just a little harder than I thought, or its a bigger problem than I thought.
Oh well, thats how we win food wars. One bit at a time.